- Syawal, please welcome!

Masih bersarang rasa rimas. Masih berbuku rasa tak puas. Masih tak cukup rasa ikhlas.

Penangan dosa -

Sampai hilang nikmat taubat.

Jumpa punca. Tp masih hilang arah haluan utk bermula.

Mana mungkin.

Jazakallah.

- bukan Ramadhan yg terbaik

Betapa kalau tahun - tahun sebelum ini, selagi terdaya akan kumpul kekuatan utk berterawikh.

Membudayakan yg sunat.

Memudahkan apa saja yg sukar.

Kali ini betapa kisahnya berbeza. Mudah leka. Mudah hanyut. Menjadi the other side of me.

... or the real me? *hmm!

Tipu kalau kata tak sedar. Bohong kalau kata tak rasa.

Bimbang.

Jazakallah.

- last.

Lepas ni dah xnak nanges lg dah!

To awak - Terima kasih awak sebab ada utk kita dlm waktu-waktu mcm ni. I know you feel hurt. Awak pun tahu yg kita dah cuba kan? Tapi, terima kasih sbb tetap sudi dengar masalah kita. Pesan awak:

"redhalah kalau dia bukan milik kita" - saya tgh belajar nak redha la ni!

To anis, darling and christ - Kak chi tak kuat sgt la awak. Puas dah kak chi tahan. Hopefully esok boleh kerja elok-elok. Terima kasih sbb bg nasihat yg mengarut. *haha!

I promise to myself - last! :'(

Jzkk.

- boo v.1

Whether you like it or not, my boo is mine.*emo!

Assalamualaikum. Hye readers. I have a bestfriend. My bestfriend ia my ex boyfriend.

Sima : what? Are you serious? Mane ade terms kt dlm dunia ni lelaki and perempuan boleh jd bestfriend. Each of you mst ade some extra feelings. Thats why boleh attach to each other.

Manis and Darling : and now you are saying that you ade scandal ke kak chi? And, your scandal is your ex bf? Goshh. Better you get back to your ex bf je. Rather than ade bf tp attach dgn ex-bf. Pelik.

Hmm. Have a nice day readers. Jetaime.

- temu dan duga

kisahnye. tipu sgt kalau kata tak penat. since i've done everything, maka memang terasa lelahnya. sampai la ke temuduga semalam. i met Mr. Meo - my consultant - finally i decided to register with a consultant. well, to register with a consultant is actually my very last resort.

i started my interview by telling him that i was an ex-staff for DiGi. so, i come back to DiGi as my last opt after i attended 7 interviews. dah nak muntah attend interview. i thot i org paling banyak attended interviews tp tak dapat-dapat. rupanya, ade yg lg banyak! terus-terang i told him yg i memang dah give up. bukan cerewet! tp lebih memilih. well, every smile has its dark secret. no one is perfect, isnt? that's the reason why my prev employer becomes my last resort. tapi, daripada tersadai kt rumah takde buat ape pun, lebih baik terima je offer. kan? and, mungkin after 4 years byk yg dah berubah. who knows.

AND! he told me a story of a candidate -"she attended 15 interviews with salary range from rm1200 to rm1800 but didnt get any positive feedback. finally, on this one fine day she got an offer to attend an interview with Bank Muamalat. yes, she scores the position with rm2500 as her salary. see! you better not to give up. Allah always has a better plan for you. sabar. sikit je lagi. I selalu percaya dengan benda-benda mcm ni. yg penting you jgn give up. He holds you for something better."

hmm. well, brg baik memang mahal harganya. susah pulak nak jumpe. kan? nampak sgt pujuk hati. *haha! btw, after attended a few interviews i start to get a clear picture about what i wanted to do. but, somehow, i have/must follow the rules - if you cant do what you love, at least try to love what you have.

kt situlah temu dan duganya.

jzkk.

- 2015~!

Assalamualaikum. bersawang sgt kan? *haha! 2014 has ended. i had a very tight schedule for my december. a very long weekend travel. Alhamdulillah. semua dah selesai. n now i  am busy with  my job hunting. *hurm!

well, hello 2015. gosh. such a terrified year for me. only now i feel a bit insecure with myself. jobless. single. as if - teruknya nasib kau? am i going to be single for the rest of my life? am i going to live like this everyday? but, why now?

kusut. tergerak hati nak skrol ig. terpandang a post by one of my favourite girls - NSMF. she talked about ad-dhuha. which, all this while i have a wrong perception about dhuha prayer. she reminds me in her post that ad-dhuha sebenarnya lebih kepada utk mendidik hati supaya merasa serba cukup. biar pun kurang, tetap cukup. biar pun tak sempurna, tetap cukup. biar pun tak hebat, tetap cukup. obviously, kalau kita rasa cukup, kita akan sentiasa rasa mudah dan murah rezeki. hebat kan solat dhuha?

kecukupan itulah yg mengajar hati ini utk bersyukur dan bersedia dgn rezeki Dia. cakap pasal rezeki pulak - 

tipu sangat kalau kata tak penat berusaha. but some how, i know He is there for me. He is ready to give what i need when i need it. He knows when i am ready for it. MAKA - tak payah la awak yg tak perlu ni nak berpantun tentang rezeki dan jodoh kita. your concerns are much appreciated. deal? easy. bahagian yg kusut td pun takde la kusut sgt bila hati dah redha. kan?

insyaAllah, tomorrow will be my 6th interview. Alhamdulillah. i know that i am not so qualified for the position but i will try my best.

take care readers. jzkk. 

- the changes

People change.

But,

He changes a lot - positive.

No more marah-marah. Nada lebih cool and sexy. *hurm! He is a better man now. Alhamdulillah. Melihat dia membesar dgn lebih baik sepanjang dua tahun berkawan ni, makes me wonder apa yg buat dia berubah?

Moga terus-terus dimakbulkan doa mak dan ayah. *amin!

Good night: #MH a.k.a Mr. Hersheys nan sekeping!